In Loving Memory of My Mom

Today marks an entire year since God called my mom home to Heaven.  Although I know in my heart that she is pain-free and in the presence of Jesus, I miss her more than I could ever put into words.  I found a voicemail that I had saved on my phone from her and cried.  Pictures make me cry.  Family memories make me cry.  Everything is making me cry today.  There is a certain heaviness to everything I do today.  

Last year, at this time as I packed a bag and boarded an airplane to Nebraska to be at my mom's funeral, I purchased a new journal to write my thoughts and feelings in during that very long and difficult week.  I knew that much of the time would be very overwhelming, and I figured writing down what I was going through would help me remember it all.  I looked over the journal this morning for the first time since she passed.  I haven't had the courage to face the memories before today.  The very beginning of my journal is my speech that I gave at her funeral.  I knew I would be a teary emotional mess; so I wrote out the whole speech so that I could just read it on the day of the funeral.  I am sharing my speech today as a tribute to my wonderful mom.  I wish with everything that she were still here, but I know I will see her again.

"Today it is my privilege to rejoice that my Mom is no longer suffering here on earth.  I find great peace and joy in knowing that she is finally seeing her glorious Savior face to face.  I get comfort in Christ for her homegoing, although it is very difficult and sad to say goodbye to her.  Today we celebrate the life and incredible influence of Deborah Vasel, whom I have had the blessing of calling 'Mom.'

I have so many memories of Mom that it is hard to even know where to begin.  My earliest memories are of her constant encouragement and creativity.  She introduced me to art and crochet and soap-making and a host of other creative activities.  She put her own creativity to use in planning elaborate birthday parties for us, helping us in our school projects, and planning church events.  I always remember Mom using this creative talent to serve others and make others happy.

My mom always made sure that our home was filled with music.  I could not possibly count the many hours she spent playing the piano and singing praises to her Lord.  Because of her, we learned countless hymns and choruses that have stayed with me to this day.  She taught us songs and practiced them with us so that we could sing them in church together as a family.

I learned a good work ethic from my mom as well.  She made sure that all of us kids pitched in to help out around the house.  I will never forget how my mom would get up early every morning to go with me on my paper route so that I would not have to do it alone.  She was constantly driving us to our after-school jobs and reminding us to get our school projects done.

My mom was an excellent teacher.  She was especially good with little kids, teaching them songs and vividly telling them Bible stories.  She inspired me to become a teacher.  Her creativity and her dedication to her students were boundless.  So many of her ideas and methods I carried over into my own teaching.  And, when I graduated college and got ready to start my first teaching job, she drove with me to Massachusetts to help me get settled in and ready to go.  That was some precious time with my mom as we shared meals and ideas.  She helped me tackle all the unfamiliar things of adult life - car payments, bank accounts, etc.  And as I struggle through that first year of teaching, she cheered me on and prayed for each of my students by name.

My mom was an amazing wedding planner.  I relied on her so much in help planning my wedding since I was too far away to do a lot of it.  She rose to the challenge and made it a wonderful and unforgettable day.  I was excited to get married, not just because I loved my husband-to-be so much, but also because I saw how much my mom loved my dad and I wanted a relationship just like theirs.  Mom took care of Dad and selflessly gave up her own wants to benefit their marriage and our family.

There are many more things that I could tell you about my mom.  Once, she planned a surprise trip to my home in Oregon right after I had given birth to my third child.  I was so shocked that she had managed to pull that off - and so grateful that I got to have my mom with me during that crazy time of adjusting from two to three kids.  What a wonderful memory!

The longer I have been a mother myself, the more I appreciate my mom.  I recognize all the times in our childhoods that she sacrificed for us and loved us unconditionally.  She taught us and trained us.  She laughed with us in our joyful times and cried with us in our low moments.  And oh, how she prayed for us!  A major constant in my life has always been that my mom has prayed for me.  In this, she was a faithful example from my earliest memories all the way to her home-going.  She fervently prayed for us, for my dad, for her church family, and for the many others that came into her life throughout the years.

There are no words to describe how much I will miss my mom and my friend.  I am truly thankful that she is pain-free and that she is in the place she so longed to be.  Someday I will see her again.  Until then, I will lean on Christ for the comfort and consolation that only He can provide.  

   'Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.  For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ.'  (II Corinthians 1:3-5)

Goodbye for now, Mom.  I love you and can't wait to see you again."